A Grown Up’s Gap Year – The Newsletter #24

Make Space To Welcome SPACE, In Your Life.

A reminder to streamline, and constantly reassess.

HELLO – HAPPY SUNDAY!

What are you doing to make life happen, for you?

I asked that on an impromptu Instagram reel this week and goodness, did it land.

Actively carving out a purpose that feels like your own. Because at this stage we shouldn’t be waiting for the magic bullet of the perfect time.

Excellent timing is never visiting, my darlings. So this week, your nudge is to be firmly in the driver’s seat of your own life.

For many women in our community, this chapter — after kids, after compromise, after the shoulds and the schedules — is the first time they’ve even considered putting themselves back in the picture.

With this in mind, you might also benefit, as I did this week, from a stern chat with yourself. I found myself slinking back into self-doubt land, not unfamiliar territory. I thought I’d successfully relegated it to the back seat (Liz Gilbert’s Big Magic, anyone?), yet a few too many “not you, not now, possibly not ever” moments crept in over the past few months.

I am pooped. You might be too. It’s that time of year. When we’re depleted, vulnerability knocks. We think, “Why bother stretching?”

My natural habitat is noise-cancelling headphones on, fingers tapping a keyboard, punctuated by long pondering walks. It has been a huge year getting A Grown Up’s Gap Year out into the world.

An engaged, full life means the days are full. I try to protect that from unnecessary stress. For me that begins with an uncluttered environment, forethought in the household, a clear “yes” to what feels super, and a definitive “no thank you” to anything that makes me glum at the mere thought of attending.

So I took stock. Back to the Season of Winter for a while.

For me, it looked like tackling a long-overdue home overhaul — still full to the brim with kidults in their childhood bedrooms and all the paraphernalia. I’ve wrestled much of it off to new homes, called in trades to patch, paint, reattach, refresh, and as we near completion, it feels wonderful.

My wardrobe is leaner after the winter cull (with more to go). And while I’m pausing before farewelling many of the vintage kimono I lovingly sourced from grannies’ attics in Japan, I know I’ll feel lighter for divesting some.

All this to say:
Make space in your life to welcome in SPACE.

Because this is where joy resides.

Floating in a cloud of joy every day is a ridiculous ask. It becomes performative when that’s the goal. But stopping to revel in the small moments? That I can do. You too.

And when you do this, let’s make a pact to get on with the things that have us springing out of bed in the morning.

Let me know how you get on. I love to share our stories.

I hope this helps a little.

Hugs for a super week,

Monique x

I DID A SHIRLEY VALENTINE

Podcast this week I was the guest

The mic was flipped this week.

I joined Michelle Parsonage on her brilliant podcast Your Second Act — and we got real about ageing, agency, running away… and yes, I encouraged her to ditch the guilt about taking time for herself. Plus why I think retirement is a terrible goal.

It’s a warm, honest chat with plenty of laughs.

LISTEN HERE

DIARY NOTE

Banana Bread Procrastibake

This week, I made an old favourite I turn to when I feel like a good ‘procrastibake’ moment. The boys love it ( they take a packed lunch to work, cause eventually they would like to buy a house in Sydney and that will only happen with sensible decisions now, like not buying lunch everyday).

Because sometimes, a litle ‘new life designing’ starts right there — 30 minutes in your kitchen, a plan scribbled on a notepad, and a big fat “Why not now?” written across a recycled envelope.

I like momentum while I think.

Here’s the original Annabel Langbein recipe (Mum’s is probably better, but she doesn’t actually follow a recipe, so you will have to pop over for a slice of hers), and another old fav on my blog if you have a little more time and you’d prefer a Coconut Passion Cake

WATCH HERE

(READ · LISTEN · STAY)

READ | ARTICLE

How to Politely Confront Someone by Chris Voss

My 83 year old Papa is my news clipping agent, sends me lots of interesting things to read and watch. This one might be handy if you struggle to set boundaries on your time and space.

READ IT HERE

LISTEN | PODCAST

Queen of Confidence

I love Erika – on the surface we couldn’t be more different (adored always in a glorious sparkle of pink sequins – but inside I think she’s my soul sister – very much younger 😂 – except she really does the shit whereas I spent too much time in my head, still – this week’s episode is really, really great for personal brands and small businesses – on theme with our ‘momentum makes shift happen’.

LISTEN HERE

WATCH | MOVIE

Something’s Got To Give- SBS

Vale Diana Keaton – what a great and devastating loss. Be inspired by her ‘de-turtlenecking’ in this fun and fabulous film.

WATCH HERE

DEAR BLOKES

A love letter (with checklist) from the women who carry the mental load.

I haven’t forgotten you.

In fact, I’ve got a long list of second act legacy ideas I’m working through in the next book.
Think: purpose, partnership, and how to avoid becoming one of those ‘blokes she left behind.’

Meanwhile, I’d love you to start tuning in — if you haven’t already.
Our weekly podcast always ends with a note just for you.

Head back to Season One — nine episodes — and a few minutes at the end of each just for you, with love from us.

THEY ARE ALL HERE